Bedroom Banter Gone Wild

Hubby: Yes, I love that trick you do with your mouth.

Wife: What trick?

Hubby: The one where you shut the fuck up and go to sleep.

Wife’s eyes widened, and she leaned in, crossing her arms. “Excuse me, what did you just say?”

Hubby, grinning like a mischievous schoolboy, looked up from his phone. “Oh, you know, the magic trick you do every night.”

Her eyebrows arched skeptically. “Magic trick? I’m all ears, go on.”

“Yeah,” he said with an exaggerated motion, as if explaining the secret of the universe. “You start by talking about everything under the sun—your day, your plans, the laundry, what to have for dinner tomorrow. You build up this grand performance.”

He paused for dramatic effect. “And then, poof, just like that… you fall asleep mid-sentence!”

Wife stared, not sure whether to laugh or smother him with the nearest pillow. “So, you’re telling me my ‘trick’ is falling asleep?”

“Yep,” Hubby nodded, still grinning. “It’s amazing. I never know when it’s coming. One minute, you’re asking about my day, the next, it’s silence. Like magic. And I’m like, ‘Where did she go?’ It’s like I’m in the presence of an elusive sleep wizard.”

Wife put a hand on her hip, rolling her eyes. “Well, if I’m a wizard, then you’re the one who cast the spell. Every time you snore, I’m instantly transported to dreamland.”

He snickered. “Touché. But, let’s be real, I know who’s got the real magic around here.”

Wife raised an eyebrow. “Oh? And what’s that?”

“The way you can disappear when I need help with the dishes, laundry, or anything.”

She smirked. “That, my dear, is called ‘selective hearing.’ Now, poof, I’m going to sleep.”

Hubby laughed and nudged her. “Okay, okay, I’ll give you the title of the sleep sorceress. But only if you promise not to perform your ‘trick’ when I’m asking you to take out the trash.”

She pretended to think, then shrugged. “Sorry, no promises. It’s part of the spell!”

He sighed dramatically. “Wife, the only thing I can count on more than your trick with your mouth is your ability to dodge chores. Now go on, do your magic. Goodnight, sorceress.”

Wife turned over with a playful grin. “Goodnight, Magician of the Snore.”

And just like that, the silence settled in, and Hubby heard the soft sound of her breathing—proof that the trick had worked once again.

Related Posts

Hidden Dangers in Your Mouth: Early Signs of Oral…

Oral cancer can develop quietly, often without pain in its early stages, making it easy to overlook. Many people dismiss small changes in their mouth as harmless,…

27 year old woman ends up DYing after deciding to eat only F… see more

A shocking and heartbreaking case has emerged involving a 27-year-old woman who tragically lost her life after making a drastic change to her diet. What began as…

All the royals who have been named in the Epstein files – and what it means

The dust is slowly settling following the release of the latest, enormous batch of files relating to convicted pedophile Jeffrey Epstein. After much speculation – and no…

Turning Point USA halftime Super Bowl show lineup revealed – and everyone’s saying the same thing

As Bad Bunny prepares to headline the Super Bowl LX Halftime Show on Feb. 8, Turning Point USA has announced its own rival event, offering Cristian viewers…

Ex-LA County worker arrested in Nancy Guthrie case

At last, there’s been an arrest in the Nancy Guthrie kidnapping case — but not the kind many were hoping for. Federal authorities have taken a man…

Theater with hilarious comeback after brutal joke resulted in Amazon pulling ‘Melania’ movie

An Oregon movie theater was forced to pull Amazon’s Melania documentary after its tongue-in-cheek promotion reportedly didn’t sit well with the streaming giant. The Lake Theater and…